How Childhood Wounds Secretly Sabotage Your Success (and What to Do About It)

I've had a profound realisation lately, like peeling back a layer of my life and seeing the intricate gears and levers that drive everything. It's both simple and complex, hidden in plain sight until now: the undeniable truth of how my childhood wounds have shaped everything I do – every decision, every reaction.

We all carry wounds from childhood, no matter how idyllic or challenging our upbringing. These experiences leave us with beliefs about the world and the emotions attached to them, guiding our every move. Let me share some of mine, and how they've played out:

1. The Fear of Speaking Your Truth

I learned early on that expressing my truth was "bad," even punishable. It felt safer to present a palatable version of myself.

Result: I would speak up, but in the presence of those I perceived as more powerful, I'd retreat, go quiet, and sit on the sidelines. I'd dilute my message to fit in with what I thought was acceptable.

The Learning: I realised that this was a disservice to others. Making it safe for myself deprived them of the opportunity for real transformation. Catering to their existing beliefs kept us all stuck.

New Result: True growth happens when we dance on the edge of our comfort zones. I now vow to stand in my truth in all my communications, offering authentic growth and transformation to those I serve.

2. The Fear of Going Directly for What You Want

I grew up believing that if I went directly for my goals, someone would intervene and stop me.

Origin: This belief was reinforced throughout my life. As a child, I'd be redirected from my path whenever I got excited about something. Later, when my passions didn't align with my parents' or husband's views, I allowed myself to be redirected again.

Result: This created a mess of deception and self-sabotage. I'd procrastinate, get distracted, and create a smokescreen around my true goals.

New Worldview: I have a right to be passionate and pursue my dreams wholeheartedly. Getting sidetracked with non-essential tasks only takes me away from what I truly want.

New Result: Growing up is realising that... (to be continued in my next post, where I'll explore the power of setting boundaries and owning your desires).